In what may be the most chaotic — and strangely on-brand — outburst from America’s most controversial First Son, Hunter Biden unleashed a profanity-laced tirade this week targeting Hollywood star George Clooney and other Democratic power players tied to former President Barack Obama.

In an interview released Monday with YouTuber Andrew Callaghan, the 55-year-old Hunter didn’t hold back as he blasted Clooney, 64, for daring to suggest that Joe Biden should step aside from the 2024 presidential race due to — how shall we say — certain visible signs of vintage mileage.

“F*** Clooney and everyone around him,” Hunter snarled. “I don’t need to be polite.”

Charming, as always.

🎬 Clooney the Brand — Not the Actor

“I agree with [director] Quentin Tarantino,” Hunter ranted. “George Clooney isn’t a mediocre actor… he’s a brand. He’s Barack Obama’s friend. Big f***ing deal. What the hell does that have to do with anything? Why should I listen to him?”

The comments were sparked by Clooney’s July 10, 2024 New York Times op-ed urging Democrats to consider a new candidate for the presidency — one whose sentences didn’t trail off mid-stage or require… rerouting.

Naturally, Hunter took it like any loving son would — by going full scorched-earth on his father’s critics.

🎟️ That Fundraiser — And the Awkward Presidential Amnesia

Hunter also brought up the now-infamous Biden fundraiser in Hollywood — hosted by Clooney and Obama — where President Biden reportedly froze on stage and had to be gently led off by his predecessor like a confused wedding guest who wandered into the wrong reception.

According to a new book Original Sin by Jake Tapper and Alex Thompson, Biden didn’t even recognize Clooney at the event. When prompted, a staffer had to clarify, “You know George… George Clooney,” to which the President replied, “Oh, right… Hi, George!” — as if George had just fixed his sink.

⚖️ Clooney, Amal, and the Hague… Somehow?

As the rant continued, Hunter veered into foreign policy, dragging Clooney’s wife Amal into the fray for her role in supporting ICC charges against Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu — a move the Biden administration had criticized.

According to Hunter, Clooney got so worked up that he sent “a flurry” of angry messages threatening to “embarrass the President and pull out of the fundraiser.”

Because when you think nuanced diplomacy, you think… George Clooney in a group chat.

🧾 The Real Villains: Obama’s Brain Trust

But Hunter wasn’t finished. Oh no. He had a whole hit list to run through.

• James Carville? “Hasn’t run a campaign in 40 years!”

• David Axelrod? “Only succeeded once — and that was because of Obama!”

• David Plouffe? “Just a second-rate speechwriter with an ego.”

• Pod Save America? “Washed-up Senate staffers playing pundits.”

• Anita Dunn? “Cashed in $40-50 million off the DNC!”

In Hunter’s eyes, they’re all opportunists — parasites feeding off the Obama name while backstabbing Joe in his hour of need.

“They’ll all pass their judgment? So will I,” Hunter thundered.

🎤 Final Thoughts: Family Politics, American-Style

If American politics were a movie, Hunter Biden just turned it into House of Cards meets The Wolf of Wall Street — only with more Red Bull and fewer filters.

While President Biden continues to grapple with his political legacy, his son is out here lighting fires with a gas can and a podcast mic.

George Clooney has yet to respond — possibly because he’s busy writing the screenplay to his next film:
“Good Night, and Good Luck… and Goodbye, Hunter?”